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JOKES

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1

Marketing companies should use chromosomes in advertisements because sex cells.

2

Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.

3

Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like banana.

4

Two fish are in a tank. One turns to the other and asks How do you drive this thing?

5

You want to hear a pizza joke? Never mind, it is pretty cheesy.

6

What is the best part about living in Switzerland? Not sure, but the flag is a big plus.

7

I married Miss Right. I just did not know her first name was Always.

8

Learn sign language, it is very handy.

9

You want to hear a pizza joke? Never mind, it is pretty cheesy.

10

What do you call dangerous precipitation? A rain of terror.

11

What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? Tooth-hurtie.

12

Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears!

13

My resume is just a list of things I hope you never ask me to do.

14

I have spent the last two years looking for my wife killer, but nobody will do it.

15

What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A widow.

16

Just went to an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.

17

How does NASA organize their company parties? They planet.

18

What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

19

A magician was walking down the street and turned into a grocery store.

20

Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

1

testing.. testing..testing..testing..testing..testing..testing..testing..testing..testing..testing..testing..testing..testing..testing..testing..

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2

eturn: he listed himself as the head of the household!

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